Anthony
Passion Fruit
Special Mr Universe
Posts: 17
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Post by Anthony on Jun 17, 2012 10:53:02 GMT -8
Get it? Fuckers of mothers? Motherfuckers.
Meh.
My awesome wife and boys gave me a certificate for a couple of old Riley shaves at the local barber. Good times.
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Post by Neil T on Jun 17, 2012 10:57:35 GMT -8
My awesome wife and boys gave me a certificate for a couple of old Riley shaves at the local barber. Good times. Ask them if you can use one for your pubes. |
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btaylor
Unicyclist
Mike Rowe-Lookalike Surveying-Balloon-Dad
Posts: 58
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Post by btaylor on Jun 17, 2012 12:33:35 GMT -8
My gift is merely to have alone time to get work done and watch some TV. I do not need anything special.
Last night I made sure to take the family to my favorite watering hole here - BJs (Leykis laugh) Restaurant and Brewery and have myself a Harvest Hefeweisen. The kids dig it there since we make sure to go when the Giants are on TV.
I will call my old man today, but since he was 44 when I was born, he is now 85, and too cheap to buy a quality hearing aid so it winds up being a repetetive shout-fest with him, which is not enjoyable.
"So Dad you and the girlfriend going on any trips soon?"
"What?"
"YOU GOING ON ANY TRIPS?"
"Say again?"
'VACATION? YOU GUYS?"
"Oh. Yes we are thinking about going somewhere."
"WEREN'T YOU GOING TO OXFORD FOR SOMETHING?"
"What?"
"THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO OXFORD. IN ENGLAND!"
"Oh. Yes, we will be doing that next month"
"YOU ARE GOING THERE TO STUDY SOMETHING?"
"What?"
"YOU-"
(turn to look at wife and kids for sympathy, who are on the floor laughing at this. Repeat this for 20 minutes until I get sick of it)
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Post by Fuckface on Jun 17, 2012 20:11:55 GMT -8
Happy Fathers Day! May your children work hard to pay off all of our growing debt. Or pass it on to your future grand kids.
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2bor
Unicyclist
Posts: 71
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Post by 2bor on Jun 18, 2012 3:27:37 GMT -8
My kids got me a shirt with their hand prints on it. Since they cannot speak english yet I suspect they didnt do this on their own.
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rbf
Unicyclist
Ozzie, say Job: "Yob!" Say you: "Joo!"
Posts: 61
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Post by rbf on Jun 18, 2012 4:57:12 GMT -8
You would think the kiddies would be too young to pull something like that off, but when my oldest was 18 months she somehow managed to swipe my credit card and rack up a bunch of bills on internet porn sites.
Heh, the wife and I still can't figure out how she did that. It's quite the mystery.
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2bor
Unicyclist
Posts: 71
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Post by 2bor on Jun 18, 2012 5:04:17 GMT -8
The real mystery is how you convinced your wife your daughter did it.
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rbf
Unicyclist
Ozzie, say Job: "Yob!" Say you: "Joo!"
Posts: 61
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Post by rbf on Jun 18, 2012 5:08:28 GMT -8
wha..ha...What!!!
How Dare YOU!!!
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Post by Fuckface on Jun 18, 2012 14:12:48 GMT -8
Saw this and thought of HV.  |
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